Allowing Grace

There is a trick to getting help: You have to allow it.

Here’s a clip a friend showed me about women accepting a compliment.  I laughed and cringed at the reflection. 

How are you at receiving a compliment?

Good? 
Good for you!

Hard? 
Why? Have you ever thought about the inception of deflecting a compliment? I have.

I don’t have an answer –yet.   Just observations:

“You are awesome.”
“You too,” I toss back quickly.

“Thanks for the help!”
“You have always helped me,” I lobby.

“You look great.”
“So do you.”

“Thanks for the insight.”
“It’s not me,” and on and on I go. It’s quite the exercise to create a safety wall from appreciation. Yes, that is what we are doing.

When did accepting a compliment translate into egotism? When did saying, “Thank you” become not enough?

How about:
“You are awesome.”
“Thank you.”

“You look great.”
“Thank you.”

“Thanks for the help.”
“My pleasure.”

“Thanks for the insight.”
“You are welcome.”

Or, perhaps a receptive smile. 

Silence is receptive.

Silence is receptive.

Slow down. Take an inhale and an exhale: Silence is receptive. 

I recently watched this and appreciated the most concise metaphor of what it is to create your life, and the phrase: In --> Out 
rather than 
Out --> In 
has really stayed with me. 


The gist is that when we were kids we acted as we felt and lived in a world of that reality. As adults, we look to our external environment and adjust to fit, as opposed to that child who lives openly and thusly happily regardless of environment.  And it seems in the world today there is an immense amount of lack: not good enough, worthy enough, rich enough, pretty enough...so, if we look outside before turning on the Spark inside, well it can be a little tricky. Take the time to tend the internal flame, and we light up everything and everyone around us -- just like a baby's smile.

When we turn inward and take responsibility for our creation and  a complimentary reflection comes, it’s time to accept it: say, thank you. 

If you are wanting to claim a space at the table, and you receive a compliment which you deflect, that is the same as shaking your head at an offered seat and walking away proud of your gallantry only to sulk in the corner. There is no beauty there.

What we believe of ourselves is what others believe of us.
What we allow for ourselves is what we live.
If we allow Grace, we allow Beauty to find us. 
We allow Life to Live us.

"Where is the door to God?
In the sound of a barking dog,
In the ring of a hammer,
In a drop of rain,
In the face of
Everyone
I see."

-Hafiz


Let the Grace In.
It's time.

-stay connected, 
kate.
@wisdomofone

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